Post Argument Memorandum | Lent Prep | Easter Prep |
Memorandum: Post-Discussion Reflection
This might feel a bit formal, but it is to keep in your family discussion records so you can keep track of what you have been arguing about, why you are arguing, and how you resolved the argument / discussion including any promises made during the resolution.
To: [Name of other person] / [Personal Records] From: __________ Date: March 18, 2026 Subject: Summary and Reflections regarding and agreements/promises [Brief Topic of Argument]
1. Objective Overview
Briefly describe what happened without using "charged" language. Stick to the facts of the event.
Example: On [Date], a discussion occurred regarding [Topic]. The conversation escalated when we reached the point of [Specific Trigger].
2. Core Perspectives
My Perspective: Summarize your main point and why it felt important to you.
[Point A]
[Point B]
Your Perspective (As I understood it): Demonstrate active listening by summarizing their side. This helps identify if there was a misunderstanding.
[Point A]
[Point B]
3. Points of Agreement
It’s rare to disagree on 100% of a topic. Highlighting common ground lowers defensiveness.
We both agree that [Common Goal].
We both value [Shared Value/Standard].
4. Primary Friction Points
Identify the specific "nodes" where the argument got stuck. Was it the tone, the logic, or a past grievance?
The "What": [The specific detail or decision causing the split]
The "How": [Notes on how the communication broke down, e.g., "I felt unheard when X happened."]
5. Proposed Resolution / Promises / Next Steps
What needs to happen to move past this?
Short-term: [e.g., Taking a 24-hour break from the topic.]
Long-term: [e.g., A scheduled follow-up meeting on Tuesday.]
Changes: [e.g., I will commit to [Action] if you can commit to [Action].]
